


To Us, You're Still Here

by LadyMatt



Series: LadyMatt's Fun-Size Ficlets [3]
Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, An unexpected delivery evokes a fond memory, And this REALLY did, Father of two Alec is upset but also uplifted, For all the reasons you can imagine, If you can see past the pain, Is still navigating the unthinkable months later, M/M, Magnus Bane has passed away, Magnus' family will always keep him close to their hearts, POV Alec Lightwood, Please be warned, Promised I'd challenge myself, TO BE CLEAR: Magnus Bane's Death Has Already Occurred, There is joy and love in here too, Widower Alec Lightwood
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-30 19:50:22
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 500
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20102683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyMatt/pseuds/LadyMatt
Summary: On the morning of this, the hardest of birthdays, Alec takes delivery of a mystery package that reminds him just how lucky he and his family have been, despite life not going the way he’d wanted it to...





	To Us, You're Still Here

**Author's Note:**

  * In response to a prompt by Anonymous in the [sh_ficletinstruments](https://archiveofourown.org/collections/sh_ficletinstruments) collection. 

> **Prompt: Week 3: Abstract Reverie Painting by Magdalena Morey.**
> 
> *PLEASE READ THE TAGS FIRST*  
[You're Still Here by Faith Hill has lyrics that capture perfectly what this fic tries to convey (if you're interested!)](https://youtu.be/y5IJ1C5u1JY)

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

_‘You hate it,’ Magnus states with amused certainty._

_Hate was a strong word for something that made him feel...nothing._

_‘It’s very...blue,’ was all Alec could manage about the messy artwork Magnus was apparently admiring during an afternoon stroll through a London gallery._

_‘That’s very _you_ to say so,’ Magnus countered fondly, arms slipping around Alec’s waist and a lingering kiss pressed to the corner of his answering smile. ‘I think it’s pretty.’_

_‘You think everything’s pretty,’ Alec replied softy, his first ever compliment never far away when Magnus uses the word. Then he receives another._

_‘On the contrary, Alexander, I just have a deep appreciation for things that make this world a more beautiful place to live in,’ Magnus explained, eyes warm with love. ‘Yourself and our children included.’_

*************

They’d left without purchasing anything. Magnus had arranged this in advance. For Alec’s birthday.

The memory, blessedly unsullied by the year long heartbreak that’s followed since, is pin-sharp behind his closed eyelids, a ragged breath and shaky smile emerging as the remembered happiness momentarily eclipses the dull ache that usually weighs him down when no-one is watching.

He misses impromptu getaways.

He misses everything.

Swallowing against the grief threatening to mar his precious thoughts, Alec drags his focus back and exhales.

Somewhere, his ridiculous, beautiful, much-missed husband is grinning mischievously at his reaction to the delivered artwork sitting half-opened on his lap.

‘You _really_ shouldn’t have,’ he chuckles dryly, shedding the protective wrapping and wondering where he should hang it. Somewhere dark maybe?

He’s guided towards their apothecary-cum-office, sure that its incongruous placement amongst the framed flora and fauna had been the intended destination. In Alec’s direct line of vision when sat at his desk, it would forever enshrine those beloved compliments, and incite endless eye rolls that Magnus had declared ‘adorable’ while feigning a swoon during a playful bout of teasing.

‘Even blurred, this looks awful,’ Alec jokes tearily, wishing hands capable of untold power and exquisite tenderness would materialise to shove at him in faux disgust. He daren’t even think about a hug.

Clearing his throat, he rallies.

‘The boys will find this amusing,’ he declares, relishing the prospect of sharing more of Magnus with them, determined to include him in everything they do. It’s another bittersweet but welcome reminder of their father’s teasing ways, one of many, both inconsequential and significant, that have helped cushion their hearts against the life-changing _agony_ of his absence. Temporarily, anyway.

Aged nine and seven respectively when the unthinkable happened at a client’s establishment, Rafe and Max had suffered immeasurably, but all three were united in their absolute need to keep Magnus close. Like, having any unexplained things being solved with, ‘That’s Papa being silly.’ Two other secret smiles being all the agreement required to do the trick.

It’s no substitute for when the sheets feel cold at night and whispered endearments have to be imagined.

But he knows they’ll find their way back to each other eventually.

Just not yet.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

**Author's Note:**

> TY for reading! X


End file.
